I was showing my stylist Ulrick, who I hadn’t seen a while, pictures of my chemo curls and stating my displeasure with every picture I showed him. He gave me such a beautiful new perspective on it, that I can no longer feel frustrated or traumatized about it.
He patiently listened as I bitched and moaned for about 15 minutes straight. Then he blew me away when he said, “Don’t you see, Megan-Claire? You have been styling and wearing your hair like a crown of curls.”
He scrolled back through the pictures I showed him. He said, “You keep saying you don’t know what to do with the curls and don’t feel feminine, yet you have it styled them so beautifully with the fascinators, jeweled headbands, pulling it back on the sides with combs and trying different products to see what works best on them.”
I honestly never thought of it in that way. I was always dealing with them with an air of frustration and disgust instead of embracing this IS my hair and recognizing all the multiple ways I’ve been styling it and working it to feel more like ME.
He said, “You look so regal. Embrace your queendom.”
As I showed more pictures of the cancer fundraisers I’ve been part of, the survivor prom, outings with other warriors and published pieces, Ulrick blew my mind once again with this statement below.
“Don’t you see how your cancer experiences have transcended into pure love of people? In a time where many of us desperately need to be uplifted and have our voices expressed, you are doing just that. Your words and actions have transcended beyond age, race, religious and gender barriers. You are just pure love.”
There is a reason why the term “hairapy” was coined because it was one of the best therapy sessions I’ve had, especially as it relates to acceptance of my hair.
My hair has grown so much in the past six months. The back is all one length now. It’s still super thick. When he went to trim it, I didn’t even have any split ends!
Six months ago Hair on 5/26/18 Hair on 5/27/18
So, in order to trim my hair, it has to be blown straight because my curls are so tight. Ulrick said the way my hair seems to be growing, the “crown of curls” will grow out instead of down, the longer it gets. I have been looking at pictures on Instagram and Pinterest at biracial and Latina women with curls. I have an idea of what it will look like the longer it gets.
Plus, this copper color looks great on my skin. It sometimes feels too light, but I always get compliments on it. It goes well with my skin tone. My other stylist, Vicki, came up with that hair color. You can really see the color when my hair is blown straight. It looks darker when it’s curly.
So, the moral of my piece is this…
Instead of fighting to claim what once was, I’m embracing the new and choosing how to react to the trauma of my hair coming back different and life post cancer being different. I no longer just see how the chemo and other cancer treatments changed my outward appearance. I now view my hair as a true crown of curls that has given me a new perspective on learning to love and accept myself.
Since Saturday, I feel a little more at peace and walking with even more grace and regality.
Until next time,